Sunday, October 23, 2005
{ 5:40 PM }
ok today was boring....while other grps had their pw meeting, my grp didnt....well, gd in a sense dat i could had a proper n gd break on a lazy sunday...well, helped my mum do house work, den had instant noodles fer lunch coz my mum n my bro went to town to get something....recently played quite a lot of FIFA 2002 world cup (is a bit old lehz....) n used England, my favourite team....n outplayed every team in the game n.....lost to Spain in the final game!....damn....wasnt too happy coz i could win Brazil, the strongest team in the game....haha well i guess in life dere r ups n downs..........sometimes in life u could deafeat someone who is better n stronger den u but u tend to be out smarted by someone who is weaker den u due to complacency....well promos results are out tmr n i am kind of scared......coz i already noe my maths got a F!.....i tink my econs r better but den i dunnoe whether can pass or nt coz i got a F fer CA, i tink dat is a psycological barrier....but i tink i can...well..... Chinese i tink shld be ok.....no "A" though....a few days ago lin lao shi say she could see dat i worked v hard....well is dat a clue to my result??....haha well i dun wanna guess........
these few weeks i hav been reflecting a lot.....ya, abt myself n wad i did over the past few months.....i dunno whether i am hardworking? but den i onli noe i seems quite stressed out...n in the end i kept failing tests?.....i dunnoe y larhz this year i am extremely stressed quite easily....my O level days nt even so jia lat lorhz....maybe coz due to extremely competitve environment ba.....rmb the gd old days when i was in new town....i could slack like crazy n no pressure fer me to be stressed coz my frenz dey all also slack, well......maybe dat kind of environment is better fer me?...but den each has its own gd i muz say coz honestly, i can communicate wif A02 better den E4/4....." If fail promos den go poly lorhz!...." dat is wad i always hear from pple saying, but to tink of it, u hav to give up a lot of things when u transfer to poly....u waste one year in junior college, waste one year of ur life, leave ur frenz n the comfort zone dat u r in fer the past few months....n fer me, i hav to give up my favourite sub-- chinese (unless i go ngee ann n take chinese studies)....basically, in a lot of pple's perspective, failing promos is a disastrous thing dat can ever happen....retaining is an option but den i tink dat is nt fesible fer me coz is like our batch is the last batch to take the old syllabus so i tink no point repeating.......n hav to take the compulsory four sub....three sub cant handle le den y take four sub?......will going to poly next year happen to me?....i dunnoe....my mum as always said dat i am lucky coz every year i pass my exams wif juz a mere pass....n enter junior college wif 20 pts....n mum wans to see if i am so lucky again to pass my promos wif a border pass.......but den it seems like the odds are stacked against me, juz like if dere was a soccer match between Brazil n Singapore, of cuz u will put ur money in Brazil......i am like Singapore.....i try nt to tink so much fer now coz fer the past two weeks, although exams r over, i haven been truly happy.....although i am smiling more often den juz b4 promos......dunnoe y but den something juz keep bothering me larh.....well, i will keep myself in a positve way n try nt to affect my daily life....well, i hope god bless me fer tmr n it will be a gd day fer me??......i hope so......